Mind Your Focus and Focus Your Mind: From the Sublime to the Ridiculous and Back

It was a beautiful Friday afternoon, the kind that makes me itchy to close the computer, grab my puppy (Shanti), and hop into my vintage red BMW convertible for an adventure! It had been a really great week business-wise, and I was ready to celebrate.

After some galivanting around, Shanti and I ended up in downtown Asheville. I was able to grab a prime parking spot in front of Chai Pani Indian restaurant on Battery Park Avenue, and we headed over to the Book Exchange and Champagne Bar, a combination champagne bar, old bookstore, and music venue where dogs are most welcome. They sat us at a community table outside, right in front of the jazz band tuning up for their first set. Within minutes, I was having great conversations with the other “strangers” around the table. By the end of the set, I had secured a potential new contract for Continuum, reignited my goal to embark on a bike touring adventure, and made some new friends. 

I was feeling pretty sure of myself. It was one of those rare moments we’ve all had when you feel like everything’s under control, and all is good in the world. 

Shanti and I headed back to the car, and once she was safely settled in the passenger seat, I turned the key in the ignition and looked over my shoulder, expecting to pull out into traffic. Click-click, click-click. The car wouldn’t start. “No problem,” I thought. “This happens a lot with the old Beemer.” 

I opened the trunk, pulled out the jumper cables and attached them to the battery, ready to make a quick and easy jump when I could catch the eye of a driver with a healthy battery. In the meantime, Shanti and I were providing good entertainment to the clusters of people waiting in the Kilwins ice cream line next door. 

Drip, drip. I looked up to see the sky darkening with thunder clouds. It was time to get that jump. You see, the convertible top was down, and I had no way to raise it without power.  My efforts to secure assistance immediately became more assertive. I knocked on the window of a nearby car to get the attention of a man waiting for someone. He pulled up and provided the jump. Click, click. Nothing. Drip, drip, kaboom. The storm was upon us.

That’s when it became ridiculous. 

I pulled out the car blanket I always carry in the trunk and tried to cover the car as best I could so that Shanti, the Beemer, and I could stay as dry as possible. The rain started coming down harder and the thunder crashed. Shanti and I were somewhat undercover in our blanket-made tent. One of the waiters from Chai Pani saw our predicament and brought a big table umbrella to cover the car, but the umbrella was damaged and wouldn’t fully open. So, there we were, riding out a thunderstorm in an open convertible with a blanket and big, orange, broken umbrella on top of us. 

As the storm worsened, the waiter brought over a second table umbrella and covered us with it. With Shanti and me somewhat more protected, I started calling Triple AAA, ending up on hold for more than twenty minutes. I was obviously not the only person impacted by the storm. Stuck in the car, I couldn’t stop laughing at the ridiculousness of our situation or my earlier thought that I had “everything under control.” Do we ever have things under control, really?

The storm did finally subside, the tow truck showed up, we were able to get enough power to put up the roof, and a friend arrived to drive the very wet Shanti and me home. 

As I sat on my porch the next morning, sipping coffee and reflecting on the previous evening, so many lessons emerged from that experience that I want to remember. 

Sublime to Ridiculous

Stuff happens every day. We can slide from great to zero in a minute, depending on the situation we find ourselves in. The belief that we ever have things under control is an illusion; life is constantly changing. Cultivating resilience is key to navigating those changes successfully and having a sense of humor along the way is an essential ingredient, too.

Ridiculous to Sublime

We cannot control all the external things that happen to us, but we are in TOTAL control of our thoughts, attitudes and the stories we wrap around the experience. Instead of sitting in the storm under a sopping wet blanket, laughing at the ridiculousness of our situation, so grateful to the strangers who were placing umbrellas on top of us, I could have been afraid of the storm, angry that the roof would not work and that my car was getting wet inside.  I could have been fixated on how much it would cost to fix, cursing at the phone, and basically pitying myself. There are so many possible responses to our circumstances. We choose where to put our focus and that influences what happens next.

Focus Our Minds

I believe that how we talk about situations in our lives and the stories we tell about them, will actually shape our experiences, our successes, and ultimately, our happiness. 

Mind Our Focus

It is so important to notice and “mind our focus.” It takes practice to pull our thoughts out of the downward spirals our minds get sucked into and to continually shift our focus towards the good and the possible in any situation.

Let’s Choose Love

There is so much love in the world. There are strangers who care and are ready to extend their love and help at the drop of a hat, or in this case, at a drop of rain, if we are open to see and accept it. When we choose love as our focus, we’re choosing to both give and receive it.

View more of my Let’s Choose Love ideas in my STORY, or read about our grants (and apply!) on our Mini-Grant page.